2 Timothy 2:24
24 And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.
If you look up the definition of quarrelsome, it says “inclined to quarrel; argumentative; contentious.”. This makes it a personality trait, not something that you do at the point of exasperation. If you are a quarrelsome person, it would be hard for you to teach and be kind, because you would see the negative side of most things and argue. No one is going to listen to a person like that. I wouldn’t.
You have to make a choice to be kind and patient. In a moment of conflict, think before speaking. Would arguing help get your point across or just make things worse? Would walking away be a better alternative? Sometimes, the other party involved has another issue that is coming out with you. Perhaps we should keep that in the back of our minds. If someone is being combative and you can see no reason for it, don’t respond negatively. Try asking if everything is okay; show some sympathy. If it doesn’t work, offer to pick up the conversation at a later time. If you’re at a loss, ask God what your next step should be.
Remember, in all things, honoring God should be our highest priority.